Complicated
by LenaV
Summary: The eleventh doctor finds himself chained to a piece of junk with what seems to his two previous regenerations and all of his and their companions so far. Things get even more complicated when alien banshees start to approach and it turns out that his own first regeneration is very near. The funny thing is, all he really wanted to do was try skiing. . .
1. Introduction

***Author's note: please don't go too hard on me, this is my first fanfiction, and it really isn't meant to be at all serious. ***

This was _wrong_, the doctor thought. Besides the fact that he was handcuffed to something with ten other people (something that appeared to be a broken...he wasn't even sure a broken what, not being able to get a proper look, but it seemed to weigh at least a ton), this was absolutely wrong. Both in the way that this could catastrophically alter his and other's timelines, causing a paradox that could tear a hole in the fabric of the universe, and the way that many of the people here meeting each other could cause arguments, jealousy and so many other feelings. Absolutely NOT the things his eleventh regeneration was good with. And, alas, it was only with Amy that he could rely on Rory to sort it out if any feelings ever surfaced. This was going to be difficult.

His right hand was handcuffed to Amy (who, on the other side was handcuffed to Rory) and his left to River (who seemed to be handcuffed to the whatever-it-was on the other side) and craning his neck, he could see Donna, Rose and a few heads he couldn't see well enough to recognize. Oops.

"Okay," He said, speaking mostly to the three people standing closest to him, "This was a very acute psychic teleport, responding to the slightest thought. I warned you! Now, who was thinking of handcuffs?!"

He realized, as Rory attempted to raise his hand, that his voice had broken the tense silence. Everyone suddenly started saying what they had to say about the awkward situation, and the Doctor suddenly felt really bad for Rory, because even if Rory wouldn't mind being chained to Amy, being stuck between Amelia Pond and Donna Noble was a situation no one would want to be in. He braced himself for the explanation that would have to follow after the noise died down.

"Oi! You're stepping on my foot!"  
"Sorry! Really, it wasn't my fault, you kept talking about handcuffs all morn-"

"You're on MY foot now!"

"What the hell happened?"  
"Where are we?"  
"What?"

"I should have laser in my pocket, if I can only get, we might be able to get the cuffs of..."

"Who are you people?"  
"Ow! Doctor, I swear I thought working in unit would stop this, but-"

"How did I get here?"  
"Captain Jack Harkness, and who might you be?"

"Quit flirting!"  
"I was only saying hello..."  
"I really don't mind,"

"What?"  
"Amy, you married me!"  
"He was only saying hello!"

"Oi!"

"I blame the banshees,"

"I think I recognize this place..."  
"I see the TARDIS! Listen to me, I see the freaking Ta-"  
"But no, I randomly materialize here-"

"Sweetie, do you mind-?"  
"You're right, that IS the TARDIS, an early version, by the looks of it, maybe-"

"What?!"  
"_I know where we are!_" Someone finally cried.

Chill's went down the eleventh Doctor's spine. This was worse, this was so, so much worse than he had thought: he knew the voice of the speaker all too well. The doctor himself had used this voice nearly two hundred years ago. This was the voice of his ninth regeneration.

Oh, this was proving that it was going evolve to be so very paradoxical...


	2. Chapter 1

"Nevermind where we are," Donna said loudly and irritably. "How did we get her?"

_So Donna,_ the Doctor thought, _Doesn't even know my past self, yet still snaps at him._

"Yeah," Amy agreed, "Doctor, this would be a great time to explain,"  
"Yes, yes!" The Eleventh Doctor said quickly, "Just one moment,"

"I'm working on it," The voice of his previous regeneration said behind him, at the same exact time.

"Don't you think I'd have said something if I knew? I don't even know who you are." The ninth hissed, barely a second later, still obviously mad that no one had listened to him.

"How can both of you be here?" Rose asked, confused and shocked as she looked at the tenth and ninth regenerations of the Doctor.

"Why didn't you mention me?" Jack pouted. "I am here_ for you_, too."

"Doctor, there's three of you!" River stated happily.

"Don't start mentioning the possibilities..." Amy warned, raising her eyebrows.

"I wasn't going to! Two of them don't even know me yet!"

The ninth Doctor started to talk quite loudly, drawing everyone's attention. "Shouldn't we be trying to get out? I don't know about _you_, but I do not entirely fancy being stuck here. And if anyone wanted to actually listen, I would be able to tell exactly why we need to get out of here, and fast."

"Yes...?" The tenth Doctor asking, sounding a bit too patronizing for the ninth's liking.

"Turn around! You can see the TARDIS!" The ninth regeneration snapped.

The eleventh Doctor craned his neck, but the piece of junk blocked his view.

"That is exactly what I was saying," Jack informed them.

"Oi! Mr.'I'm immortal', no one heard you. Listen to Nose, will you?"

"_You_ were the one not listening to me a minute ago!"  
"We are not getting anywhere!" Rory exclaimed. "Will you just let him speak or not?"  
"Thank you!" The ninth Doctor said."Really, if this is an early version of the TARDIS, a very early version, and we are in a junk yard..."

"Oh!" Gasped the tenth Doctor and the eleventh Doctor at the same time. Everyone else looked confused.

"What?" Asked Martha, who had said very little so far.

"We have to get out of here," The eleventh Doctor said, "Who was saying something about a laser?"

"I did," Jack chimed in, just as a piercing scream rang out. It was far too loud to be able to understand from which direction it was coming from, but the eleventh Doctor could see clouds of grey-blue steam advancing slowly, holding a vaguely humanoid shape.

"Now, we are in trouble," He muttered, attempting to raise his left hand hand to his ear.

"You're twisting my wrist," River winced.

"Sorry! Jack, get the laser out, as fast as possible! Donna, try to move your hand with his so that he actually can do that."

"Quit being patronising! You won't even tell us what's going on!" Donna said indignantly, but obeyed.

"Quickly, please! These...smoke creatures, they are very dangerous, but slow. We have a minute or maybe-" The eleventh Doctor's words were cut of my another shriek, worse than the one before, and now he wasn't the only one trying to hold his hands over his ears.  
He watched Jack fumble with the handcuffs and finally reach a small handheld laser that looked sort of like a hybrid between a laser pointer and a miniature laser blaster.

"Got it," He said, "I guess-"  
But they never learned what exactly he guessed (perhaps that was for the best), as a scream twice as loud as the one before that pierced the air.

"What are those sounds?" Asked Martha.

"They're what's gonna kill us in about twenty seconds if we don't move! Jack, use the laser!" The tenth Doctor suddenly chimed in, now being able to see the clouds very well.

"I'm with two of my own previous regenerations, in a situation which I accidentally caused, maybe about to die, and for some weird reason I do not remember this. This couldn't get any more paradoxical and confusing, could it?" The eleventh Doctor muttered.

"Don't think so," Amy said quietly, just as a familiar voice called out of the TARDIS,

"Grandfather? There's loud shrieking here and some people I don't in the junkyard!"

"I stand corrected," Eleven winced.

Jack was awkwardly trying to cut the handcuffs in between of him and Rory, taking a few seconds longer than it should because of his restricted movement.

"Isn't there any way to stop them?" Rose asked.

"Not if they're what I think they are," The ninth Doctor replied, craning his neck to look at the the smoke, which was now taking even more distinct shapes.

Jack had now cut the cuff between him and Rory and the one between the eleventh Doctor and Amy. He was now working on the one between the ninth Doctor and the piece of junk, and working efficiently.

"I figured that if I cut every second one-" He started, but the shriek cut him off yet again. "Ugh! Why do they always have to interrupt ME?"

Apparently, the cloud-like creatures weren't the only ones who interrupted Jack that day: an old man came out of the TARDIS. He was wearing a scarf and had longish white hair. "What is going on here?!"

"Don't tell me," Amy sighed she and Rory backed away. "Another version of you?"

Jack undid the handcuffs between the tenth Doctor and Martha just in time: the entire group scrambled away from the shrieking cloud figures.

All of them were running at different speeds, the handcuffs slowing them down. Even though the tenth Doctor headed for the TARDIS, both of the other versions turned the other direction, ducking through random junk and everyone else followed, even if the tenth Doctor, Rose, and Martha seemed to have some doubt about where they were going.

The shrieks grew quieter and quieter, and when no more than an echo was left, the group stopped to catch their breath.

"Now," Donna panted, "Will someone finally explain the way we got here, what was out to get us, and the old man in the TARDIS?"  
"I can't pretend I know, myself." The tenth Doctor grumbled. "At least not the answer to the first question."

"Yeah," The eleventh Doctor said, "I can. There is just one thing."  
"And what is that?" Asked Martha, beating Rose to the question.

"Two things, actually. No, three. Four." The eleventh Doctor motioned towards Jack. "First, we're still handcuffed together in pairs. Second of all, I am the only one who knows everyone here. Third of all, the things- I am going to call them banshees for now, though that's not the proper name- not being able to get us, are now probably after someone else. Even though they're very loud and slow, some people would be foolish enough to approach them and get themselves vaporized, which is not something I fancy happening. Then, there is a very confused younger version of me who is probably chasing us to figure who we are, which I actually remember now. Let's start with the last issue."

"It'd make the most sense to take care of them in order, sweetie," River pointed out.

The eleventh Doctor paused, then nodded, though he did grumble, "Linear."

"Shouldn't we get on with it?" The tenth Doctor said, looking slightly angry with the fact that someone else was taking charge.

"We are!" Jack said, passing the laser to Martha,"Ladies first. Hey, why are you wearing this?"  
"Since you bothered to ask," Martha half-scoffed, "I was going to get married in two hours before I was yanked out to...I don't even know what."

"Ooh, the second time that happens!" Eleven clapped his hands together and Amy giggled.

"I am not going to ask." The tenth Doctor took the laser gingerly from Martha to start melting the handcuffs between him and Rose. "Rose, careful! This would burn straight through your hand in seconds!"  
"Oh!" Rose exclaimed, drawing her hand away. "You could have said that before!"

"Introductions?" Donna hinted impatiently.

"I'm still not going anywhere until you explain _everything,_" The ninth Doctor warned, seeming quite glad to get rid of Martha handcuffed to him.

"Yes, yes!" The eleventh Doctor sighed. "So. Introduction. I'm the Doctor."  
The tenth Doctor lifted his eyebrows, but didn't protest. "So am I."

"No, no." The ninth Doctor argued, "I am the Doctor."  
"Yes, you are." Eleven said, taking the laser from Ten. "Ninth regeneration. I'm Eleventh."  
"Tenth." Announced the other Doctor. Nine looked skeptical, but said nothing.

"I'm Amy." The Scottish girl declared and added, before Rory had a chance to say anything, "And that's my husband, Rory."

"Donna Noble."

"I'm Rose Tyler."

"Professor River Song, University Of- sweetie, be very cautious where you point that!"

"Captain Jack Harkness, Jack to _friends." _

"Quit flirting!"

"I am not flirting!"

"My name is Martha Jones. Should've been Martha Smith by now." Martha interrupted.

"You're marrying _Mickey_?" Ten asked.

"Isn't he still my boyfriend?" Rose asked.

"Apparently not," Ten shrugged, not looking at all like he felt all that bad for her.

"Probably yes, in your timeline. Maybe I am from a later time." Martha offered.

"Sure," Ten reckoned, now looking a bit disappointed. "Why not?"

River cleared her throat, slipping her wrist through the hole Eleven had made in the handcuff. "Is that everyone?"

"Yep," The tenth Doctor replied. "Alon-sy!"

"Hang on!" Nine snapped. "Next, I thought I'd made it clear that I'm not going anywhere until I get a proper explanation. First of all, we don't exactly look normal right now, do we?"

"First comes before next," Amy muttered as all of them turned to look at each other. Truth to be told, before Nine pointed it out, everyone was too busy to look at the bizarre appearances of others. Now it became quite clear they wouldn't be able to blend, exactly. Martha was in a short, white wedding dress decorated with scarlet roses and bows. She seemed irritated by the sudden materialization in a strange place. Rose had a daisy behind her ear and her hair up in strange, but pretty braids. She kept glancing at the eleventh Doctor as if she was trying to figure him out. Ten was wearing a fake mustache, which he quickly tore of. Donna, on the other hand, even though she was also wearing one, left it on proudly. Amy was wearing leggings and a long winter scarf, but was otherwise the most normal looking. Rory was wearing a light coat with hot chocolate spilled all over his front. He was looking at the previous companions of the Doctor as if he expected them to turn into Daleks any second now. Jack was dressed up as Santa Claus. He gave all of them a wide grin, which Rory didn't seem to like. River was soaking wet and wearing the Eleventh Doctor's jacket. She didn't look like she liked the look Rose was giving the eleventh Doctor. Eleven was wearing a ski cap and a heavy coat.

"Mustache parade, Earth, year 2687." The tenth Doctor explained, motioning to himself and Donna.

"Planet of the fireflies." Said Rose.

"Wedding," Snorted Martha.

"Easter," Confessed Jack.

Now everyone was looking at Amy, Rory, The Eleventh Doctor and River.

"It's rather a long story." Eleven said.  
"You owe us an explanation." Donna stated. "You seem to not have been yanked out of where ever you were and appear hear."  
Everyone seemed to agree to that: Martha crossed her arms over her chest, Rose nodded, Jack gave them a charming smile, and the two Doctors raised their eyebrows.

"Yes, yes, okay!" Eleven agreed. "So, Rory, Amy, River and myself were going skiing..."

"Except Amy dragged Rory of to see the ice sculptures," River interrupted. "And I decided to finish a paper in the small cafe on top of the mountain."

"So you pretty much went skiing alone?" Rose beat Martha to the question.

"Well, yeah." The eleventh Doctor admitted. "But it really does sound better if I say that we all went skiing. . ."

***Sorry for the confusing chapter! I'll try to cut down the dialogue in the next one (which will be flashback, the Doctor's story), I realize there is a bit too much talking and too little action in this one.***


	3. Chapter 2

_Amy sighed. "Can't we do something actually fun, like Space Florida? All we do lately is set the TARDIS to random and meet people and-slash-or aliens who want to kill us."_  
_"Fair point," Rory admitted. "The stone age was...well, sort of swampy."_  
_He glanced down at his ruined clothes to show the point._

_The Doctor pouted, but River looked like she wouldn't mind going somewhere with better weather. _  
_"Promise that if we do go somewhere quiet, you won't make a habit of it." He conceded._

_"Would you let us make a habit of it?" Amy asked in the sort of tone that one would use when talking to a child._

_"Fine." The Doctor said slowly. "And quit being...patronising."_

_Amy ignored his last comment. "So...where are we going?"_

_"Somewhere fun! Just as you wanted!" The Doctor couldn't help looking immensely smug._

_"Don't tell me you are just going to type exactly that into the navigational system and let the TARDIS figure it out." River guessed, unimpressed. "I've always thought you were more creative than that."_  
_The Doctor glowered, but said nothing and proceeded to do exactly what she described._

_"How do you know that the TARDIS doesn't have the same definition of fun as you?" Rory asked._

_"Actually, I don't." The Doctor admitted. "That's why I am putting in 'somewhere fun and quiet'."_  
_"That should work." Rory nodded, though he really had no idea if it should or shouldn't work._

_The Doctor nodded happily and continued to steer the TARDIS. River trailed behind him, pulling the levers that he seemed to have forgotten. _

_"Why won't she land?" The Doctor asked, pushing a small orange button over and over again._

_"She has landed, sweetie." River remarked. "Now I see why you keep the brakes on: you wouldn't know if it was safe to walk out if you didn't."_  
_The Doctor muttered something that sounded a lot like "whatever". _

_"Well, come on." Amy called, grabbing Rory's hand._

_"Yes, yes," The Doctor said, not sounding entirely enthusiastic._

_"Environment checks?" River offered, but he pretended not to hear, opening the door wide. A gust of cold wind entered the TARDIS, getting a load of snow onto the floor before the Doctor managed to shut it._

_"Fun?" He turned to the TARDIS console, then back to the door, opening it a crack and peeking out. "Oh."_

_"What?" Asked Rory._

_"Winter Wonderland." The Doctor stated in a flat voice. "You think she is trying to highlight the fact that it would have been Christmas back at home for you?"_

_Amy shrugged. "That sounds cool, actually. Mind checking it out?"_

_"Yes, I really do mind." The Doctor looked quite annoyed._

_"Then we appreciate it even more." Rory said smugly._

_"Is everyone against me today?" The Doctor sighed, even more annoyed at Rory using his own words against him._

_"Yep." Amy glanced at Rory, who echoed her._

_"Alright! We can go skiing! I went skiing with Alexander Duma once! Or maybe with Taylor Swift. One of the two." The Doctor exclaimed, suddenly excited again. _

_"I'm going to stay in the TARDIS and finish a paper." River decided and glanced at the Doctor as if she was expecting him to win the argument._

_"What? I thought you were on their side." The Doctor said, surprised._

_"I was. Just...Winter Wonderland, sweetie? I thought we were going somewhere with better weather."_

_"What? You don't like snow? Everyone likes snow."_

_"And I want to finish what I was working on before you blundered in."_  
_"I thought you'd like to do something with us. Stone Age sounded good!" The Doctor said defensively. The truth was that he was aiming for another point quite near the university and accidentally landed underneath the window of River's office, but he didn't want to give her another excuse to tease him for his driving, so he'd lied that he was going to pick her up: no harm done, and he had stone age planned for a while. But if Amy had dragged even him into this, there was no way that she was worming out of it, he decided. "You can do that there."_  
_"I can't ski and work on a paper." River sighed._

_It was a while until they had come to a compromise of her staying of a small cafe and joining the others if she got done with the part she was working on when he arrived._

_"You'd have to upload the information onto a computer or something." The Doctor warned. "No technology from the fifty-first century. This is 2022."_  
_"Hang on," Rory reminded, "It's winter out there. We're dressed for early autumn."_  
_"Yes!" The Doctor said cheerily. "We'll visit the TARDIS wardrobe."_  
_And so they did. The Doctor outfitted himself in a terribly bright-red coat and a green ski cap. Rory put on a simple blue coat and hat. Amy debated for quite a while before settling on a light caramel coat with a matching hat, scarf and leggings. River out in a very light white coat that seemed to be final proof to the Doctor that she wasn't going to ski. _  
_"At least put on a scarf or something," He suggested. "Not only you won't be able to go skiing like this, but you'll catch a cold just outside."_  
_"I won't catch a cold, sweetie, and besides, that really not what you're worried about. "_

***Sorry for the extremely short and late chapter. I'll do a better one this weekend, just busy with the start of school again.***


End file.
